Sitting here unable to sleep I have slept some just not through the night. I’ve had a busy week with getting bloods done and a few groups I got to, to help get out the house.
I made bread and butter pudding at the cooking group on Wednesday, my son loved it 😋. I didn’t think he would due to the texture. I’m going shopping later and have my son for a few hours so hoping to get some more sleep!
I really need to tidy the house, my frontroom is beginning to look like a horders house. Stuff everywhere.
The problem is I start to do it then I do too much and then I am in pain. I hardly cook for myself because I don’t have the energy to do so. I have asked my doctor if there is any help like I.e a carer that can help with things couple times a week, but nope I’m just left to try and do everything myself.
I concentrate on the cats and the cat trays and everything else gets neglected. It’s making me depressed. I’m going to try and sort it today wish me luck!
I come down with the cold yesterday after looking after my son the past week. (School holiday).
I tested to make sure it’s no covid and it negative, I feel like death warmed up and had all my energy taken from me. I managed to get up and put a load of washing on as that really needed done.
Apart from that I’ve been in bed the past 2 days watching tv/movies.
I didn’t got to bed till 2am which is unusual for me but I’m addicted to this game atm. So I didn’t wake up till 2pm.
Then I’ve just sat in bed all day with matching playing it all day, still playing now. I’m not tired yet but don’t want to get in the habit of going to bed early hours and not waking till late in the day.
Don’t want to be nocturnal, lol.
Not wrote on here in months… thing is I don’t really do that much or anything exciting to put. My life is pretty boring, just me and my cats and my son the weekends.
Hope everyone’s had a great start to the new year, I finally had my operation that had been cancelled 4 times due to covid on the 15th December.
I finally was properly diagnosed with endometriosis and found an issue with one of my ovarys, I feel good to be validated and not it’s just in my head crap. Other than not much had happened in January.
I forgot to say I got my money back too (PIP). So was a good end to the year. Getting my op and money back the same week!
Yesterday was payday so was out early to do my shopping etc before it gets busy as I hate shops when it’s busy. Then had to get home for my delivery and unpack. By the time I got that all done my shopping delivery came so had to put that away, if I’m lucky I had 30 mins to chill, before getting my son from school. They finish at 12 here in Scotland on Fridays.
Had to go straight to my mums after that as I had to look after Bailey my mums dog has he got epilepsy, while mum went to work. Her partner is away the weekend to some do (I dont know).
Mum didn’t finish till 19.00, so was home quite late and was knackered.
Today just been tidying up as I have the engineer coming out tomorrow due to my Internet being crap since last weekend with the storm. Then picked my son up for a few hours so his dad could do shopping in peace. With all this I’m totally shattered need my bed and it only 17.30!
I woke up to it snowing this morning, as expected by the weather forecast. I love snow its when it turns to that slippery ice that you almost break your neck on that I hate.
I really need to get my house sorted big time but I just don’t have the energy. I don’t know why maybe because I’m depressed but also ill waiting on my operation. but its so bad I just want to sleep all the time.
I have lots to clean but on a good note I finally did the cat trays they were long due, but they were done today but that’s all that has been done, I’ve not even made myself anything to eat.
Started off the week being upset with being treated differently, and I really hate it it the one rule for one but not another.
I got to a group on a Monday for mental health and to get people out the house etc… well last week I asked about bringing my son due to the fact the are off school, got told no… to which I replied that’s out of orders so because I have a child I got to stay locked up in my house because I can’t bring my son to one session? Yet 10 mins before I had spoken to another girl in the group that’s in the same boat as me, yet told me she allowed to bring her daughter!
You get me now?! So I was raging at that then my sons dad says to be on Friday that I’m not allowed to see my son till I’m better, which I don’t know if I will ever get better because eds effects us all the time. It upset me so bad that I had very bad thoughts.
So currently sitting feeling sorry for myself with knowine to talk to and nothing to do. It’s started snowing here where I live.
Yesterday me and my son put the Christmas tree up for my daughters 12th birthday. I don’t get to see her because of the social work system never gave me a chance!
Every year I put it up on the 21st November as its a way of coping, the pretty lights and something that’s fun today instead of crying and being down. My son loved it let him put stuff on too..
I attended the group was looking forward to the jacket spud but ended up not having lunch as it ended up being soup, but mushroom soup… yuk🤢
I like soup but not mushroom. I made a photo frame in the crafts and then ended up attending the walking group after. I didn’t get home until 16.30, which is good in a way as it past the time but I was so knackered.
Today I sat waiting in for my ex husbands parcel that ended up running late late then I’ve just been sat at home all day doing nothing. Yet I have things to do but but after yesterday I have no energy today. Hope to feel more energy for tomorrow so I can get some stuff done.
Diary of a Chronically ill Cat Lover